Very sad...

I'm feeling so sad. Where is that cheerful girl that I used to be? I always smiled, I was always happy, nothing could disturb my piece of mind. And what is now? Do I forget what happiness means? Why is every day so stressful to me? Why do I always want to cry, to listen to sad music? Now I understand that I want nothing, really nothing and it's the worst!! Where are my ambitions, where are all my plans, where is real ME? I am scared. I don't want to lose myself. I was planning to find myself, to uncover hidden talents and what is now??? I am afraid and need some help... Nobody cares... Frankly speaking nobody knows. In public I wear mask, I don't want everybody to know my problems, my weaknesses. They think I'm cheerful and positive girl. I must take off my mask because I am fooling everybody who surrounds me, that's unfair.